Today I possibly woke up and became very upset over some nonsense I don't care to discuss here and called in sick to work. I may have then asked NB to fetch me a beer before he left for work, and as he brought me my 9am beer, simultaneously thought, "wow, what a non-judgmental sweetie," and, "wow, what an enabler".
Since I am not working today, I am of course using my time wisely and reading up on Halloween costume ideas. I read an idea for Picasso's Blue Period which involves tampons dipped in blue food coloring. I love this idea so much, but past experience indicates my comfort level with discussing menstruation is a lot greater than many other people, so maybe the tampons would gross some people out? Or not, and I don't care too much.
Speaking of Halloween and menstruation, Zombie Vulva would also be a great Halloween costume. Here's a video for a DIY vulva costume. (Fun Fact: Debby Herbenick was one of my professors in college.) Maybe use green and grey pantyhose/blankets to make it look zombified. Add zombie makeup and buckets of fake blood. Make tons of hilarious jokes about bleeding for five days straight and still coming back to life. If you like penis, change the "braaains" zombie groan to "glaaaaans, glaaaaaaaaaaans".
You can also get zombie vulva jewelry.
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